Dating a man with children is different ballgame than dating a childless man.
This is even truer when dating a man who has full custody of his kids.
Proceed with caution Whether divorced, widowed or never married, single dads have to date with care.
There comes a time and age when a single man settles on the fact that the woman he ends up with will have a ready-made family for him.
It’s the price we pay for showing up late to the ball; by the time single guy has defeated the work-force, made his bones, and decides on the whole nuclear family bit at 30 , his queen-to-be will have already danced the dance with another man.
He broke off one relationship because her dream of a downtown condo didn't fit with his need for a yard and swing set.
"I think sometimes the women I dated didn't realize that single dads still have parenting obligations that, for me, came first," said Ruyter, now 36, who maintains the blog "Memoirs of a Single Dad" (memoirsofasingledad.com) and recently self-published the book "Memoirs of a Dating Dad."Changing landscape As fathers grow more engaged in child rearing, and courts more willing to grant them custody, single dads increasingly are dating with kids in tow — in heart if not in hand.
Some 2.8 million single dads live with their kids, up 27 percent from 10 years ago and nearly double the number in 1990, according to Matthew Weinshenker, assistant sociology professor at Fordham University, who analyzed 2010 census data.
(The number likely includes many joint custody arrangements.) While single dads face many of the same dating challenges as single moms, there are some differences: In a survey of 100 single fathers, the vast majority preferred to date women with children, thinking she would be more selfless and understanding of his commitment as a father, said Ellie Slott Fisher, who conducted the survey as research for her book "Dating for Dads: The Single Father's Guide to Dating Well Without Parenting Poorly" (Bantam).
Baggage has a lot more faces than merely having children with another man, and they find out harshly that the childless woman may be a big baby herself, looking for a “daddy” to buy her things.
So men accept the fact that dating women of a certain age will result in children being almost a certainty, so they either date 19 yr old girls, or own up to the reality that their dating prospects will come with a child.
:-) As with everything, every man and woman is different, so it is hard to paint either with much of a wide brush.