When it comes to post-breakup dating, there are two main philosophies: One is that, if you date right after a breakup, you're rebounding, which is unhealthy.Then there's the whole idea that "the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else." Which is right?
However, this is usually not a good idea after the end of a serious relationship.
No matter what the cause or the circumstances, a relationship ended. Maybe you really just a want a companion to travel or have dinner with or go dancing or just hang out — with benefits or not?
You want to make sure you're not still in post-breakup mode.
You have to get past the (valid and often necessary) stage of curling up on your couch and really mourning the loss of your relationship and to the point where you're back in the swing of work, hobbies, friends, and everything else your life normally includes.
Some people however simply miss the companionship and may feel out on a limb.
Whilst singledom can be embraced in many positive ways sooner or later a man or woman will want to spend one-to-one intimate time with another person.You don’t sit around for six months waiting to heal. On the other hand, there are a completely different set of emotions surrounding a break-up. Well, it pretty much meant that I got back on JDate, found myself a cool girl a few hours later and was hooking up with her shortly thereafter. Three years later, we’re still friends and grab dinner once a month. This pattern, by the way, continued for a few months (and a few more women), until I was truly and finally “over” my ex. You need to be “over” someone in order to be able to date. When you’re reeling from a break-up, all you can do is RECEIVE. I remember reading once upon a time that people need half the length of the relationship to heal properly. Great blog Evan, I think you are right, you might feel like you want to be in someone elses company, but it´s just not fair on the other person.And while I WANTED to be ready to date, and definitely had the online dating skill set to be ready to date, I was not emotionally ready to date. But I never gave her the opportunity she deserved to have all of me. If you were together for two years, you need one year of healing. I’d probably say it’s closer to one-tenth of the time. At the moment I am kind of in that position (on the recieving end) and I am treading carefully and so is the guy, since his 4 year rel ended over xmas, and he is just putting the pieces back together.But I thought it was an important question, which is why I want to analyze it with you. I made the conscious decision to move on instantly.The only “right” answer is “whenever it feels right, as long as you’re not hurting anybody else.” The thing is: you might be surprised when you’re hurting someone else. The best example I can provide is from my own life. To me, it was the equivalent of being fired from a job. I was in no position to be a boyfriend to anyone but my beloved ex-girlfriend. My need to move on superseded her need to be with an emotionally available guy…. If so – if you’ve mourned, if you’ve healed, if you’ve made peace – then you’re ready whenever you say you’re ready.If it makes you feel good then have your hair done and your mani-pedi. You being you, at ease with yourself and the way you look and enjoying life, makes you more attractive.4. As you are getting back out there into the dating world remember to keep an open mind.