I know of a woman who so longed to be loved, held, and not feel lonely that she gave her lover, a man she hadn’t known long and knew to be a criminal, all of her life savings—some forty-three thousand dollars to be exact.
If you still end up feeling lonely and riddled with insecurity in spite of the fact that you have a man in your life, why do you still feel that having a man, having a relationship, having dalliances, having sex, having attention from these people, having an illusion, having more issues to deal with that result from being involved with these men, is the answer to your problems?
Why are you expecting different results carrying the same baggage, the same beliefs about yourself, love, and relationships, the same relationship habits, the same usual attraction to the same ‘ole assclowns?
I got used to my role as the "Single One" — I was even OK with it.
So I parse them out between friends and family, sometimes oversharing because I just need someone to validate my existence.
“People are lonely because they build walls instead of bridges.” ~Joseph F. He told me from the very beginning it would never be a relationship, and yet I have persevered with our friendship in various formats for the last seven years.
I ask myself this as I look back on the last nine years, which I have spent trying to cover up my real issue. After getting married at twenty and then leaving nineteen years later, it took another two years before I met another man that I fell in love with almost instantly.
I know that the overriding majority of women that get in touch with me and mention the word ‘loneliness’ are also lonely when they have a man in their life.
In fact, I know people who feel just as alone in a room full of people, nevermind one on one with a man.
To my surprise, the last man taught me that the last nine years have not been a waste.