In other words, to the grand majority of guys, he’s happy if the relationship is good. That’s not to say that guys don’t care, it’s just that if the relationship is going well in every way, we’re pretty much satisfied.
Certainly, you want to be sure that a candidate can legally work for you, but it's important to be careful how you ask.
These questions address citizenship, language and other touchy subjects.
We know that saying it, to some extent, is a demonstration of our commitment to her and that we’re not going anywhere. If you say it first, then it’s like you’re forcing that implied commitment, in a way.
And even if a guy does love you, he will feel to an extent that he’s being pressured.
Perhaps they are sincerely trying to assess the level of risk they might be taking. In my more hedonistic days — which admittedly were not exactly long ago in a galaxy far, far away — I was dumbstruck by the conversations I would have in gay public sex venues, even the most anonymous ones. ” would come the question by the gentleman who was fully prepared to engage in unsafe sex should my answer please him. ” I would then explain, spoken at times through a three-inch hole in the wall, that if this question was his sole criteria, then he really needed to leave this place and go directly to an HIV and STD testing center. Can we please remove this insulting, dangerous and unproductive question from our lexicon? You can simply offer your HIV status and see if your partner does the same.
Anyone who questions whether or not HIV stigma is on the rise need look no further than online profiles and hookup sites, in which “Are you clean? Or perhaps you have suffered the indignity of someone asking you “The Stupid Question” while negotiating a tryst. Implying that I am somehow “dirty” because I am HIV positive may not be the intention of the person asking the question. Like it or not, it is an assessment of the sexual viability of someone, and by extension, their “worthiness” as a human being. You’re going to take the word of someone in a dark room that you couldn’t pick out of a lineup?
I think I have been reading too many magazine quizzes and too many relationship books for my own good.
All of them pretty much say that the woman shouldn’t ever be the one to say “I Love You” first.
—————————————- Give the person time to think about these questions. Failed expectations are what causes a lot of disappointment.